by EMMIE CHRISTIE
Kittens in a box! by David Lifson | Flickr
Evelyn was on the way to her big meeting with the department heads, but the box of kittens on the side of the road read ‘take what you can’ and what was a middle-aged woman to do? Leave them?
Of course the freaking not.
She stopped her car and sighed. There were five: an all-black, one with a black sock, one with a white-tipped ear and one with a grey heart on its nose. The last had a bent tail, as if it had been caught in a door. They looked up at her and mewed, showing all their little pink throats, and Evelyn melted into hopeless snigglesnaffing. Snigglesnaffing is, of course, the technical term to describe when, within five feet of something adorable, an average human’s speech breaks into irrepressible endearments such as ‘miggle muffin’ and ‘snuffer puff.’
by JUSTIN DILL
As If Hell Were A Real Place
Michael Patrick Welch / McSweeney's
New Orleans / Ryan Thomas / Flickr
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